We're not a couple, thanks: The saga of geek love

Discussion in 'The War Zone' started by Big B, Feb 26, 2005.

  1. Big B

    Big B HWF Godfather

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    Help me understand something. I have a friend of the female persuasion that happens to be in another department at my main job. We've gotten together on a few nights and watched some movies(Monty Python or Mel Brooks stuff). Now, for whatever reason, there are a few people that seem to think we're a couple. Uh, no. I know she's not intrested in dating anyone at this point in time, so I'm not really gonna push in that direction. Do I like her? I don't hang out with people I don't like if I can help it...I'm sure most people do that too.

    I'm not exactly Cassanova here, but I don't think that a guy and gal hanging out constitutes a date or some romantic relationship. Maybe I'm just missing the whole thing...

    I'm tempted just to tell the next person to badger me about it that we're going to Vegas to elope with Elvis doing the ceremony. :rolleyes:
     
  2. Egaladeist

    Egaladeist I am the Eg Man

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    Having a girl-friend does not make you a couple...sitting down and watching a movie does not make you a couple...even having sex does not make you a couple...if she calls you on the phone more than three times a day...you're a couple! Even if you don't know it yet.
     
  3. Nic

    Nic Sleepy Head

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    yeh that is kinda annoying i have lots of m8s that are lads and when i go out with just one of em ppl assume were c'in each other........it was annoying at first bt now im used to it
     
  4. ninja fetus

    ninja fetus I'm a thugged out gangsta

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    Blah people suck. If you just meet up with someone a few times it doesn't automatically mean your dating, I hate when people assume that. What Egaladeist said is right on.
     
  5. Addis

    Addis The King

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    Yea what they said.
     
  6. ProcalX

    ProcalX all grown up

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    Unfortunatly if you sit there and deny any feelings for her and spend alot of time as good friends together then people are going to say things which is a fair assumption to make really isn't it?

    Either way you can just set them right by saying, "we're not seeing each other, just made a good friend :)" - I'd then tell them to go ask her - if they really want and they'll either walk away and go.. oh ok, and take you seriously and believe you or.. they'll be annoying and say something else - to which you can respond with:

    Just be honest and confident - or lie and be confident - throw abit of front in their face and be buntly honest - alot of people who are being cocky or trying to be funny don't know how to respond to a quit comment or an intelligently confident response. :)

    Wise words of a 19 year old lad ;)

    *Edit
    also when you next see your new friend outside of work, when chatting about work or something that links you to work just go.. "What do you think of PersonX?" - they go.. "he/she's alright i suppose" or "he/she's ok" then they'll ask why, then you say oh i just find him rather agrevating, then explain in a very summarised version whats happened - ie: "oh he/she keeps on insisting that we are seeing each other just because we meet up occasionally"..

    Just be confident / honest or be confident and white lie (don't tell a lie just don't tell her everything she needs to know..) ;)
     
  7. Waffle

    Waffle Alpha Geek

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    damned if you do, damned if you dont

    spend too much time with girls, you get labelled gay, not enough, you are also labelled gay.

    Can't win...

    is she a looker? :D
     
  8. ProcalX

    ProcalX all grown up

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    I've never had that problem myself nor have any of my friends : \ or anyone i know..

    + its not what you DO, but the impretion you give, there's alot of respectability in saying nothing.

    You see, all people whether they admit it or not believe they can "read" body language of other people to a T.. this is because they associate other people's body language with their own experience of of the same situation and body language being used.

    Like a cheeky smile after a question about "what happened last night with that girl then!!!???" and you just smile nicely - nothing cheeky or "slick" cos it won't work.. just pull a nice smile - one that is simplistic, with barely any movement - this shows that your relaxed and people believe your not lying - but you havn't said anything to lie about in the first place - nor given the impretion that your lieing.. and so you just say (with your smile) - we had a good night we went for a few drinks, and i ended up with her number..

    You see - instantly people believe your not lying - but are unsure as to whether what happened, and because they believe you - but don't have anything to NOT believe you about they respect you in your secrative and rather summarised answer due to the fact that you were honest - because you didn't lie.

    The art of a White Lie - not lieing, but not telling the truth - and not harming anyone.
     
  9. ninja fetus

    ninja fetus I'm a thugged out gangsta

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    daaaum boiii procalX da Über 1337 ladyz mahn.
     
  10. Egaladeist

    Egaladeist I am the Eg Man

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    If I were you...and this is coming from someone who has lived with several women , not including non-living arrangements and one-night-stands, and have 3 kids of my own, two in my custody right now...
    don't jump the gun...you may be in a relationship and not even know it...if you go around telling people you're not and she thinks you are, you're going to have even bigger problems to deal with!
    The best way to tell is...and I'm quite sure on this, is how often she calls to talk to you...if it's fairly often...like 2 or 3 times a day...you are in a relationship, and she's expecting you to take it to the next level...if she calls you every so often, like every couple days...you're friends!...everything inbetween is take your chances!

    And I definitely would NOT do this...

    until you're sure...if you hurt her feelings, by making a funny out of it, or imply you're angry at even the assumption...you may not even have a friendship left over!
     
  11. ProcalX

    ProcalX all grown up

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    Although i'm sure you don't need too much advice or opinions, if your regularly meeting each other to watch films by yourself - and your chatty and she smiles alot then i'd say she's interested.

    But there's alot of things that i think :) - Just be cool about it, tale tale signs that girls like you are that they play with there hair - keep moving about (nervousness), they keep their head angled towards the ground when looking at you - shyness, - lots of eye contact e.t.c

    Anyway, i'm only 19 not much experience with relationships :) (4 to date - 4-9 months - lol!) - 14 Different girls though ;)
     
  12. Big B

    Big B HWF Godfather

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    Yeah, I talked to her, casually, about the spoof elopement (it was scarcastic anyway), she suggested an alien instead of Elvis. ;) I'm not sure I want to get too serious in that respect anyway as I'd like to have my bills paid off before getting serious. I'd like to spend more time if it goes that way, and time's a bit scarce working two jobs. That's the plan...and, I've found things usually don't got according to most times.

    I can feel my geekness slowly leaving me. :(:)
     
  13. Addis

    Addis The King

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    Also they act differently when your alone then when your with a group of people. That goes for both sexes.
    I like to shut people up by saying something that they would completely not expect. Really honest and blunt. And not giving a damn. That usually works.
     
  14. Addis

    Addis The King

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    Also being with girls doesn't make you gay. I hang around with girls sometime and I'm not gay. I get pissed off at people who used to say oh your always with her you must be seeing each other. :rolleyes:
     
  15. ninja fetus

    ninja fetus I'm a thugged out gangsta

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    lolz, I've gone today without talking to one girl yet (almost end of 3d period)

    I just don't like anyone at my school. I'm by no means considered gay though, even in absence of girl my perversion remains :p (I bring pr0n>
     
  16. matttibb

    matttibb Geek Trainee

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    This thread needs to be re-named " What is your love-life like?"
     
  17. ProcalX

    ProcalX all grown up

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    Don't have one :)

    I've got a reputation for sleeping round and being abit of a womaniser (although i'm not always succesful to say the least! :D - but who cares eh? the more you try the more yes's you get, and the more you improve) - why bother with the relationship rubbish :) - In the city where i live there are over 14 different clubs, 2 of which are Super-Clubs (can hold over 2,000 people).

    One of them is slightly posher and newer, called Mercy it's awesome :)

    When i go out with mates we play a game called "brick-walling" which i came up with which is where you try and find a girl that:
    1. You Like
    2. You'd fuck
    3. You think you could hold against a Brick Wall and fuck

    It's a great game - although obviously your not always succesful getting to the brick wall stage :) I'm winning at the moment by 2 over my mate rob.
     
  18. Nic

    Nic Sleepy Head

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    :cramp: what a nice normal game
     
  19. matttibb

    matttibb Geek Trainee

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    Haha sounds fun
     
  20. ninja fetus

    ninja fetus I'm a thugged out gangsta

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    LOL@PROCALX!!!!!!!!! XD~!~ That seriously made me laugh! dirty dirty dirty.

    I sort of do that, but I call it sail and bail although I don't feel as I should be having sex I do try and get what I want out of her :). Then poof I'm gone.
     

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