Girlfriend stuff

yorkkev28

yorkkev28

HWF Minion
Maybe this isn't the place to be talking about girls. Geeks and computers u know the score.

Well ive been going out with this bird for a month now and though the bedroom stuff is great the actual relationship stuff isn't.
Just come back from a lovely meal though the conversation wasn't up to much and she's decided she feels a bit ill and has gone home. Now im not being funny but she is a hypocondriac. She always has something wrong with her.

When we go out the conversation turns to idle chit chat cause the stuff im interested in is in complete contrast to what she likes.

I like my upmarket restaurants and wine bars and she prefers the chav bars and clubs.

So what im saying is, is this a non-starter???

I just want some reassurance before i give her the push.
 
Give her the push. No point in wasting your time if neither of you enjoy talking, eating/bedroom is all well but nothing if you can't talk with some things in common.

There'll be more...

yorkkev28 said:
I like my upmarket restaurants and wine bars and she prefers the chav bars and clubs.
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Same here, although I guess the restaurants can take their toll on the wallet...
Oh and topics like this are ok. We have an admin who made a thread originally to rant about people assuming he's seeing a collegue, and now they're getting married/already married?

It's around here somewhere....
 
Great that someone finally brought up an issue like this. I've been itching to post personal stuff, but didn't think that this would be the best place.

My advice: talk about it with her. It's a bit weird, but it's best that you get her side of it before making any rash decisions. Obviously, you're living together because she saw something in you and vice versa, right? Talk about it. And things can work out between two people who aren't necessarily similar.

Take me and my recent ex, and NO, we didn't break up because we were different. We were very different, though. She was a total baptist and a decently big republican (I know..), and I'm a liberal atheist :P Anyway, we discussed it quite a lot, and we both said our sides. It was good to hear what the other side thinks, etc. And we managed to work out well for 1 1/2 years! Long time! We broke up because of distance (I was at private school), but it worked well. See what you think.
 
I still dont know what chav means!

Either way if you aint havin' fun from the start then there aint no fun to be found. The bedroom stuff just lumps a kid on you then you really are chav!

But dont ignore all the girls or you'll end up with none. Gods knows how old you are but you see more "fun" when when your 18 than you ever will, make the most of it.
Just make sure you know which are for real and which are up for a good time. A wife is far harder to find than a bit of worthless "i love you, lets go to bed"!
To be honest as soon as I feel a hard shoulder I just walk away, get a decent last romp out of it and call it the past. Not really advice but you should be having endless fun when your young. What new couples argue about beats me!
 
Chav is now in the dictionary so u can search it. Chav is:- young person who wears sportswear and designer labels such as burberry.

Im 28 by the way. My friends get younger as people the same age as me seem to loose the fun factor and most of them have kids.

The bars she likes are frequented by the beer swilling lager louts.

Babies no way!!! Marriage is a swear word as well.

We don't live together. i like my own space.

Truth is i turned her down 3 times prior to us getting together. Did i get together for the right reasons though??? Hmm

Thinking bout it this is a great place to post personal stuff. part from my gaming mates noone actually understands the geeky anorak who prefers his pc to a pint.
 
That's a really bad way to go about a relationship, from personal experience. I'm not sure exactly,what is, but if a relationship is revolving around getting some, long-term survival isn't that good. It would be a good idea to actually discuss it with her and see what else you guys like to do together. If not, then any silence is going to be awkward. If you're not ready for marriage and ready to go in, it's a disaster waiting to happen.
 
Use her for the great sex until somebody better comes along. If you turned her down three times before you got together she should see it coming. All's fair in love and war.
 
fight/war only occurs if either of the party from two dont want to compromise. Eg. America & Iran...Iran doesnt wants to stop the enrichment of Uranium and on the other side Bush administration wont allow this.
From this, I wants to say that if you guys have both opposite choices then it will end up with fight. However, if you want to stop this and wants to stay with her then as Big B suggest. GO and talk to her, U do some compromises and let her do some.
 
They've been seeing each other a month, i've had colds that last longer. You do realise that sex can be fun and doesn't have to be a serious matter all the time?
 
That depends on what you want. It sounds like this relationship is supposed to be more than just a friends with benefits thing. Everytime this sorta thing comes up, it's bad mojo.
 
just to make things clearer on this girlfriend issue. We were F**k buddies for 2 yrs before the relationship thing started. Well we have talked and discussed our fears. She is scared that im gonna give her the push cause in the past she hasn't faired to well with relationships.
And me well im not very good at emotional stuff in relationships and tend to jump ship quite easily.

Well will let u know if things go ok
 
off topic but Big B what the crap, how do you know so much. So you don't really like her and your dating??? I'm a little confused, from experience its not cool to hurt some one, like everyone else said you need to sit and talk with her about everything and make sure she understands whats going on
 
Maybe this isn't the place to be talking about girls. Geeks and computers u know the score.

Well ive been going out with this bird for a month now and though the bedroom stuff is great the actual relationship stuff isn't.
Just come back from a lovely meal though the conversation wasn't up to much and she's decided she feels a bit ill and has gone home. Now im not being funny but she is a hypocondriac. She always has something wrong with her.

When we go out the conversation turns to idle chit chat cause the stuff im interested in is in complete contrast to what she likes.

I like my upmarket restaurants and wine bars and she prefers the chav bars and clubs.

So what im saying is, is this a non-starter???
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Girlfriend stuff update:

After pondering my relationship with my girlfriend i came to the conclusion that apart from the 'hows your father' part of the equation we just didn't have a relationship.

I didn't have that butterflies in the stomach feeling and when i didn't see her it didn't really bother me.

Final straw was this weekend just gone when i told her i was going to my parents for the weekend just so i could have some time alone.

when u start lying to avoid contact i think that is rather telling of the state of things.

So ive done the decent thing and been honest to not only her but to my conscience as well.

She dint take it to well.

so i think we can say the problem is solved.
 
I would send her a card, or even flowers... saying sorry

I still love you, but im not in love with you... I feel alot more comfortable around you as a friend.

i didnt want to hurt you <name> but i had to be honest, I'm sorry

xx
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or something along those lines (and no i dont sit up all night writing love letters!!! )

best of luck with this yorkkev
 
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